(Note: sung to the tune of "My Grandfather's Clock")

My Grandfather's cock was too long for his jock,
So it dragged half a yard on the floor,
It was longer by far than the old grandpapa,
And it weighed near a hundredweight more.
He's a horn on the morn of the day he was born,
It was always his pleasure and pride,
But it dropped, shrank, never to rise again,
When the old man died.

*Chorus* Ninety years without cracking it,
What a cock! What a cock!
He spent his life whacking it,
What a cock! What a cock!
But it dropped, shrank, never to rise again,
When the old man died.

My grandfather's cock was too long for his strides,
So he lent it to the woman next door,
She grabbed it by the point, and pulled it out of joint,
So he swore he'd never lend it any more.

(Chorus)

He had a horn on the morn that he was born,
It was always his pleasure and pride,
But it dropped shrank, never to rise again,
When the old man died.

(Chorus)